Mezzamorphis

I switched my website to a new hosting plan over the weekend and had trouble getting it working. Finally, it’s back going again. I’ve got a couple articles I’m working on, and one that’s ready to go because I’m waiting for it to be published. Yes, I’ve actually got an article which will be published in a local magazine. More info when it comes out in July.

I’ve always been someone who does many different things. I heard someone on the radio this morning call themselves a generalist, and I guess that’s what I am. In high school I played football and basketball, but I was also in scholar’s bowl, math relays, speech, editor of the school paper. On top of that, I was involved in two different youth groups and worked with my Dad on the farm. I wasn’t the best at many things, but I could usually hold my own.

As I grew older my interests never really ceased. In fact, they may have become more varied. At times I’ve been obsessed with history, theology, politics, music, meteorology, computers, flying, languages, sports, writing, etc. You name it, I can probably give you some unimportant fact about it that I’ve picked up somewhere.

My frustration stems from not having much depth in any subject (save one), but having such a breadth of things I’m interested in. Before I am able to have more than a passing understanding about a topic, I get distracted by something else (ooo, shiny things!) and off I go on another hunt for information. I can’t explain why, it’s just the way that I’m wired. Link diving on Wikipedia could consume gratuitous amounts of time if I allow it to.

I’m fairly well versed in the use of technology in business, mainly because that’s what my two degrees are in. I’m more than conversant in programming and web stuff because that’s what I do every day. I don’t know if this satisfies most people, but it doesn’t me. For some reason I have this primal desire to know everything about everything.

What prompted this was a couple of things. First, I love (certain types of) music, and I love playing the guitar and singing. I’m blessed right now to be at a church where I’m able to lead worship and do both of these things. However, I know that I’m not the best guitarist or vocalist on the planet, maybe not even in the church. Not that I want to be better than someone else, but I wish I was more skilled in those areas. I see others lead worship in such an effortless and happy way and feel envious. I want to do the same thing, but if I do I know it will look and feel forced. I want to be better than I am, but can’t find the path to get there. I want to know more, to have such a depth of musical ability as to be the best I can be, but it just doesn’t happen.

Second, I was reading some of the sites that I have set up in Google Reader and marveling over how well many of them were written. At times I really wish I would write more, but I feel that most of my thoughts are either pointless, or better worded by someone else. Again, I’m better than some, but worse than many as well.

As an aside, don’t think I’m fishing for compliments here either. My wife and I were watching a reality show last week (I’m not going to say what it was, but Collette can rat me out if she wants) and there was a contestent on there who constantly said “I did horrible” or “that was the worst I’ve ever done” in order to get compliments. She was called on it by the host of the show, and it kind of convicted me on the same thing.

Am I insecure about these things? Probably. In fact, most likely. Regardless of the face I put on, most of the time I’m not the most confident person you’ll ever meet, especially when I’m face to face with you. That’s one of the most frustrating things to me though. I know that I can hold my own in most situations, but so many times I feel like the scared 18 year old kid off to college for the first time, unsure of his place in the world.

On the other hand, there are two things that I am continuing to get better at. I’m a much better husband and father than I was even a year ago. Every day I’m more in love with my small tribe. I tell my wife I love her twice as much as I did yesterday and half as much as I will tomorrow.

What I pray is that I learn to be content with the way God made me, and not be envious of those who were gifted with skills that I admire. It’s hard. I would love to be a respected theologian who can also make a guitar sound as enticing as the Greek Sirens, an uncanny predictor of the weather who also speaks five languages. However, I’ll be happy with being a father that four(?) children admire, respect, learn from, love, and count as someone who strived to raise them Biblically. I’ll be happy being a husband such that my wife knows from experience what it is to be loved as Christ loves His church. I’ll do my best at everything else.

Driving home the other night, I was listening to one of the talk radio stations in the area while they were discussing the pros and cons of the morning after pill. I disagree with the idea of it, but that’s another post entirely. The conversation drifted to whether abortion should even be legal or not.

A man called in to the show and stated that he wasn’t really sure whether he was for or against it. He said that he is a Christian, but considered himself to be pro-choice. When pressed on this, the man remarked that his father and brother are physicians, and that many years ago his father saw countless numbers of young women who had been injured seeking then-illegal abortions.

The comment that struck me came next. He said that he would rather see these young women be able to get their abortions legally than see more of them injured through illegal means.

I made a post last year on my old site (which you could find here if you want to look) where I laid out my case for why even though I believe abortion is wrong, it’s not in my power to stop someone from doing it. Looking back on that view, I would like to correct it.

Abortion is wrong. Deathly wrong.

Abortion is an easy way out of taking responsibility for an issue that we created for ourselves. If you are not ready for the responsibility of taking care of a child, don’t engage in a practice which can produce the child. Those young women who were injured getting illegal abortions refused to accept responsibility for the act they engaged in. If I commit murder, should I not face the consequences? If I steal a car, should I not go to jail? If I have sex, should I not be expected to raise the child that might be produced?

Holding to my previous view allowed me to remove myself from the problem, as if by giving over the choice to someone else it absolved me of responsibility. What goes on around us, in our community, in our families, in our nation, is our responsibility. Don’t agree with me?

³¹“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. ³²All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. ³³He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.

³⁴“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. ³⁵For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, ³⁶I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

³⁷“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? ³⁸When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? ³⁹When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

⁴⁰“The King will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.’

⁴¹“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. ⁴²For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, ⁴³I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

⁴⁴“They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

⁴⁵“He will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

⁴⁶“Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”

Matthew 25:31-46

One day we will all be held accountable for how we treated those around us. Who deserves more protection than a child? My wife and I have a seven year old, six year old, 11 month old, and will have another child in less than two months. As their father, it is my responsibility to take care of them, to provide them shelter, food, clothing. I also must teach them they are responsible to those around them, a task given us by no less authority than Jesus Himself!

So, no more nuanced, mealy-mouth positions on issues. In my early 20s, I was very black and white in my thinking. In my late 20s and early 30s, I allowed a lot of grey to be introduced into it. No more. We must be fully aware of what the Bible says and be willing to be laughed at by those around us for our views. I read a book not long ago that I’ll post about later that really challenged me on these points.

Thoughts?

I’ve been fairly agnostic about Twitter. I didn’t really see a good use for it. I’ve been roughly of the same opinion on Facebook status updates as well.

However, in the last few days, I’ve gotten more of an idea of the usefulness of said tools. I’ve found that he Facebook status update provides a sense of community with others that you are friends with. It doesn’t replace face to face interaction, but it can help keep people closer who are separated by great physical distances. If the status updates are honest, you can get a feel for the highs and lows, the ebb and flow of a person’s life. You can encourage them when they are down, congratulate them when they report something good, and just generally keep in touch.

Twitter is a little more difficult to nail down. The best example of something useful I’ve found is a weather update that I get from the chief meteorologist at WFAA in Dallas, Pete Delkus. Mr. Delkus uses Twitter to send forecast information and severe weather updates. I found it fairly handy last weekend when we had storms rolling through, and Mr. Delkus would update with when the storms would generally arrive in Dallas or Fort Worth. That is useful, timely information that I like to have.

I don’t really get into the minutiae of daily life from others on Twitter. It doesn’t really hold my interest all that much. Are there other things that you find useful about Twitter and Facebook?

My webhost transferred to a new server this weekend. As a result, I lost the last couple of posts. Really no big deal as I can recreate them. However, I did lose a couple of comments also, so Chris and Kimberly, comment again if you want to.

Starting tomorrow morning, you will start seeing posts from an old series of mine called Worship Exodus. One of the old posts will go up Saturday through Tuesday. On Wednesday, the first new post in several months will be added to the series.

Let me know your thoughts!

I’m not an economist, so I really can’t speak in detail about ways to get our nation out of the current crisis. However, the CEO of a bank is qualified to speak to it. This is part of a letter reportedly sent by John Allison, CEO of BB&T, to all members of congress.

Key Points on “Rescue” Plan From A Healthy Bank’s Perspective

1. Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae are the primary cause of the mortgage crisis. These government supported enterprises distorted normal market risk mechanisms. While individual private financial institutions have made serious mistakes, the problems in the financial system have been caused by government policies including, affordable housing (now sub-prime), combined with the market disruptions caused by the Federal Reserve holding interest rates too low and then raising interest rates too high.
2. There is no panic on Main Street and in sound financial institutions. The problems are in high-risk financial institutions and on Wall Street.
3. While all financial intermediaries are being impacted by liquidity issues, this is primarily a bailout of poorly run financial institutions. It is extremely important that the bailout not damage well run companies.
4. Corrections are not all bad. The market correction process eliminates irrational competitors. There were a number of poorly managed institutions and poorly made financial decisions during the real estate boom. It is important that any rules post “rescue” punish the poorly run institutions and not punish the well run companies.
5. A significant and immediate tax credit for purchasing homes would be a far less expensive and more effective cure for the mortgage market and financial system than the proposed “rescue” plan.
6. This is a housing value crisis. It does not make economic sense to purchase credit card loans, automobile loans, etc. The government should directly purchase housing assets, not real estate bonds. This would include lots and houses under construction.
7. The guaranty of money funds by the U.S. Treasury creates enormous risk for the banking industry. Banks have been paying into the FDIC insurance fund since 1933. The fund has a limit of $100,000 per client. An arbitrary, “out of the blue” guarantee of money funds creates risk for the taxpayers and significantly distorts financial markets.
8. Protecting the banking system, which is fundamentally controlled by the Federal Reserve, is an established government function. It is completely unclear why the government needs to or should bailout insurance companies, investment banks, hedge funds and foreign companies.
9. It is extremely unclear how the government will price the problem real estate assets. Priced too low, the real estate markets will be worse off than if the bail out did not exist. Priced too high, the taxpayers will take huge losses. Without a market price, how can you rationally determine value?
10. The proposed bankruptcy “cram down” will severely negatively impact mortgage markets and will damage well run institutions. This will provide an incentive for homeowners who are able to pay their mortgages, but have a loss in their house, to take bankruptcy and force losses on banks. (Banks would not have received the gains had the houses appreciated.) This will substantially increase the risk in mortgage lending and make mortgage pricing much higher in the future.
11. Fair Value accounting should be changed immediately. It does not work when there are no market prices. If we had Fair Value accounting, as interpreted today, in the early 1990’s the United States financial system would have crashed. Accounting should not drive economic activity, it should reflect it.
12. The proposed new merger accounting rules should be deferred for at least five years. The new merger accounting rules are creating uncertainty for high quality companies who might potentially purchase weaker companies.
13. The primary beneficiaries of the proposed rescue are Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley. The Treasury has a number of smart individuals, including Hank Paulson. However, Treasury is totally dominated by Wall Street investment bankers. They do not have knowledge of the commercial banking industry. Therefore, they can not be relied on to objectively assess all the implications of government policy on all financial intermediaries. The decision to protect the money funds is a clear example of a material lack of insight into the risk to the total financial system.
14. Arbitrary limits on executive compensation will be self defeating. With these limits, only the failing financial institutions will participate in the “rescue,” effectively making this plan a massive subsidy for incompetence. Also, how will companies attract the leadership talent to manage their business effectively with irrational compensation limits?

Good stuff.

Was doing some link chasing on Wikipedia and came across this:

The Panic of 1873 was a severe nationwide economic depression in the United States that lasted until 1879. It was precipitated by the bankruptcy of the Philadelphia banking firm Jay Cooke and Company on September 18, 1873, following the crash on May 9, 1873 of the Vienna Stock Exchange in Austria (the so-called Gründerkrach or “founders’ crash”). It was one of a series of economic crises in the 19th and early 20th centuries.

…

Years of government-promoted speculative credit created vast overexpansion of the nation’s railroad network. The failure of the Jay Cooke bank, followed quickly by that of Henry Clews, set off a chain reaction of bank failures and temporarily closed the stock market.

I’m not saying it’s a perfect comparison, but there are enough similarities to be worth the read.

So, because my web host can’t really figure out that my old database is not usable, I’ve decided to create a new WordPress database so that my site at least shows up again. Until they get the old database fixed, I’m going to leave this post up.

ReliableSite.net, my current web host, has been really good the last few months. However, all of the sudden they have decided that customer service is not important, actually replying to customer concerns is inconsequential, and they have little to no desire to help me with my issue. I’m not happy about it, but I’m also not in a big rush to change web hosts. I hope they get my database fixed by this weekend, but I’m not going to hold out much hope on it.

I shut down my old site, thinking that I would rather post anonymously. However, I haven’t posted at all. I’m really not as concerned about privacy as much as I thought I was. I am who I am. If someone doesn’t like it, that’s pretty much tough. Hopefully I’ll be able to post more now that school is done, Katie is here, and I’m trying to fill up free time.

To that effect, I’ve brought all my old site content over here. I like my new website name better, and I’m using WordPress, which seems to function a bit nicer than Community Server did. I’ll see if I can finish up a couple of my old series, and continue writing.

Thanks for sticking with me! And come on over to Mezzamorphis!